Yes. I do feel achieved. For summarizing and creating my beloved barely-2-sided-page notes for the WHOLE semester of a sickening module called Product Design & Development, PDD. Got lots of chunky 30++pg lecture, and I managed to shrink them to just ... ... one bloody piece of paper? Damn, I'm good at this.
But only for myself to be understood. I don't think there's gonna be another one person on this planet who would appreciate and understand my methodology HEHEHE.
Well, Shouldn't stay here for long though, got an exam in like less than 12 hours.
*Hoping to log off before 10 minutes*
February 28, 2011
February 24, 2011
Dejection. Sadded.
I kinda felt disappointed with myself. For doing that bad in the most important, and last-chance exam papers.
They were super tough. Well, at least for 1 out of the 3 out of the 5 for this week, it was okay.
I hate myself. For not being able to gauge everything in importance. End up to be like a wasted chap, sitting in the exam half for 2 of the papers feeling dejected greatly. I was too tired mentally and physically (hand) that I gave up writing and regurgitating information. I just gave up.
It's as if my hand was talking to my brain: "Hey, you know what, just start giving it up, even if you feel like salvaging by writing bullshit. Face it. You're not making it."
I felt like I lost hope. Seriously.
Being a student in SCL drives people to their brakdown moments. In the exam hall, I totally blew it. Even if I knew perfectly that I had to continue writing, I didn't. I did what I knew was not correct!
I think I'm losing all of it. I need fresh, new HOPE.
February 20, 2011
Damn, Feeling busted.
I might be having some kind of lung infection. Doctor @SGH gave me orders to pop down 11 tablets every morning, until the next appointment 3 weeks later. When I initially heard the news (sorry, personal), I wasn't that affected. Cause I was alone, no one accompanied me there. After I went out of the clinic, was waiting for my medicines to be collected. Just then, mummy called. Then I broke down a little. The tears streaked down so automatically.
I guess that also affected my mood and focus in the exams revision. Not been diligent enough, I guess. My mind was pretty occupied with loads of thoughts. Preoccupied. I need something to forget about the existence of my condition.
I must persevere for the exams, even if it is so tough. I must get a good-enough GPA, so that I won't feel wasted for 3 entire years.
And I am gonna be better.
I guess that also affected my mood and focus in the exams revision. Not been diligent enough, I guess. My mind was pretty occupied with loads of thoughts. Preoccupied. I need something to forget about the existence of my condition.
I must persevere for the exams, even if it is so tough. I must get a good-enough GPA, so that I won't feel wasted for 3 entire years.
And I am gonna be better.
February 15, 2011
*Useless Parasite*
Why must it always be like this?
Why must he always be like that in the apartment? Is he like that when he's with his gang of friends outside? Does he act like this useless, fucking lazy scumbag? That couldn't do anything useful enough to be labelled as useful? I'm perplexed and fucking mad.
Even though he's so popular with his gang of friends, does he practice what he preaches out their, in the family? WIll he EVER be like that? Will he FINALLY be able to communicate with his family, as well as he can do easily out there with his friends? I don't think that's possible. Will he ever remembered he had a family back in the apartment, or does he think he's the only soul in that 'house' he so calls?
Can he spare even 5 seconds to throw away his rubbish and garbage? No, he can't he has to say 'WAIT' without fail, every single time someone reminds him to do that. Though some or most of us in the family tends to get lazy at time, it's definitely not as persisting as he can be like. even if you throw the garbage in front of the room he lays, he can literally walk OVER the rubbish and then ignores its existence. WOW. This is some serious eye-brain related problem? Will he ever contribute to anything labourious in this house? will he START to do anything constructive besides his dancing, his friends, and his life? WIll it be even possible for him to not stay out till midnight every single day, if not once every 2 days? IMPOSSIBLE MAN! He practically behaves like he's living in a hostel. FUCK YOU, BITCH.
Not to mention the amount of food he eats. His bowl is alway choking full. He eats tidbits like it's rice. He finishes most of the food we intended to share and slowly enjoy over time. He destroys whatever hope we inject into the house. Whatever we tried to hopefully inject, he sucks it all out at the other end. I don't know, but he definitely eats, acts and behaves as a monster. Can't fucking stand his opinions. Why does he always think he's maligned? Is it really so? Or is it just another complete, ridiculous reasoning he tries to defend himself? I don't know!
I didn't mean to write yet another angry post, but it's intolerable. He's intolerable for existence. How to accept him for what he has been doing? Nobody can. Except for my mum. My dear mummy. who has been tolerating and bearing every single stupid action he does. For every hurtful action and comments he has said. For every single time he forgotten he has a mum that he should respect. If he ever read this post, I fucking don't care at all. He's already transformed into the stranger that I can vaguely remember as my sibling.
Why must he always be like that in the apartment? Is he like that when he's with his gang of friends outside? Does he act like this useless, fucking lazy scumbag? That couldn't do anything useful enough to be labelled as useful? I'm perplexed and fucking mad.
Even though he's so popular with his gang of friends, does he practice what he preaches out their, in the family? WIll he EVER be like that? Will he FINALLY be able to communicate with his family, as well as he can do easily out there with his friends? I don't think that's possible. Will he ever remembered he had a family back in the apartment, or does he think he's the only soul in that 'house' he so calls?
Can he spare even 5 seconds to throw away his rubbish and garbage? No, he can't he has to say 'WAIT' without fail, every single time someone reminds him to do that. Though some or most of us in the family tends to get lazy at time, it's definitely not as persisting as he can be like. even if you throw the garbage in front of the room he lays, he can literally walk OVER the rubbish and then ignores its existence. WOW. This is some serious eye-brain related problem? Will he ever contribute to anything labourious in this house? will he START to do anything constructive besides his dancing, his friends, and his life? WIll it be even possible for him to not stay out till midnight every single day, if not once every 2 days? IMPOSSIBLE MAN! He practically behaves like he's living in a hostel. FUCK YOU, BITCH.
Not to mention the amount of food he eats. His bowl is alway choking full. He eats tidbits like it's rice. He finishes most of the food we intended to share and slowly enjoy over time. He destroys whatever hope we inject into the house. Whatever we tried to hopefully inject, he sucks it all out at the other end. I don't know, but he definitely eats, acts and behaves as a monster. Can't fucking stand his opinions. Why does he always think he's maligned? Is it really so? Or is it just another complete, ridiculous reasoning he tries to defend himself? I don't know!
I didn't mean to write yet another angry post, but it's intolerable. He's intolerable for existence. How to accept him for what he has been doing? Nobody can. Except for my mum. My dear mummy. who has been tolerating and bearing every single stupid action he does. For every hurtful action and comments he has said. For every single time he forgotten he has a mum that he should respect. If he ever read this post, I fucking don't care at all. He's already transformed into the stranger that I can vaguely remember as my sibling.
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